Literary Intentions 
My husband has a history of giving me interesting Christmas gifts. I’m not a complainer because he’s a great man and even better father, so what’s to whine about, right? But I have to admit this year’s gift left me speechless, not because it was the worst gift he’s ever given, but . . . he gave me a Shake Weight.

I had seen the commercials, the SNL spoofs, and now, I had my own. I stared at my lovely gift, thinking there was no way in hell I was going to use it—at least in front of witnesses.

My husband, however, didn’t hesitate. He pulled the Shake Weight out of the box and proceeded to give me a demo. My eyes stretched in awe. Hadn’t he seen the commercials? Doesn’t he realize what he looks like as he shake, shake, shakes his way to fabulous arms and shoulders? 

“You try.” He flopped it in my lap, and I picked it up, mustering the biggest smile I could.

I gripped the weight, twisting it back and forth before giving it a lackluster shake. 

“Do you feel that?” he asked. 

“Yeah. I feel it.” I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to feel, other than idiotic.

My kids jumped up and down waiting for their turn at mom’s new arm exerciser. Was there an age restriction? A big “M” on the outside of the box—rated M for mature? I reluctantly handed it over to my son, who lifted it up and down like an ordinary weight. Phew! My daughter tried to shake it, but thankfully, she lost interest.

We finished our Christmas morning present swap with my mind wondering if the next gift I opened was a pair of Pajama Jeans or a Snuggie. I’m happy to report my Shake Weight was my one and only “As Seen on TV” find. 

It’s been a month and I have yet to use my Shake Weight. The box claims that six minutes a day is all it takes. I have six minutes I can spare, and my husband thought of me when he purchased it (hold your snickering, please). So I owe it to him to use it. Starting today, I will give up six minutes and shake my way to firm arms and shoulders. Wish me luck.

Don’t worry I’ll close the blinds.

Never heard of the Shake Weight? Check ’er out!



01/27/2012 6:59pm

will return soon

03/26/2012 2:11pm

is soon

05/14/2012 9:16am

Thanks for info

05/19/2012 10:42am

will be restored before long

09/27/2012 10:32am

Thanks for information


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    My name is Diana (a.k.a DS Tracy) I am a wife, mother,  and wannabe writer. One day, I hope to delete the wannabe part--no one likes a poser!  

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